Ruby's Addicted to Kisses
by God Emperor Penguin
Summary: After experiencing her first, Ruby has slowly become addicted to kisses courtesy of her personal supplier, Jaune Arc… Based on an idea from Nasha Rei-Kun.


**Ruby's Addicted to Kisses**

**RWBY**

_Written from the perspective of Ruby Rose_

**Summary: **_After experiencing her first, Ruby has slowly become addicted to kisses courtesy of her personal supplier, Jaune Arc… Based on an idea from Nasha Rei-Kun._

**Genre:** _Romance/Humor_

**Author's Notes: **_Thanks to __Nasha Rei-Kun for the idea!_

_If any has more one-shot ideas. Feel free to share them in a review or PM!_

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I've never kissed a boy before! Yang told me lip-bumps with boys puts a baby in your belly.

Besides who would want to kiss them in the first place? Boys are gross and icky. They smell like burnt fish rubbed in garlic sauce and boiled veggies. Who would want to get a taste of _that_? Blegh! Dad always told me to be beware of boys and not be like Yang-'_definitely don't be like your sister ho ho ho_' he says-but it's not so hard at all. I wish he didn't nag on me about it all the time.

So there we go, fifteen years without ever touching a boy. Or caring about them. Or talking to me… But Jaune doesn't really count, I guess?

I mean, I know he's a _boy_… but he's definitely a _friend_! So… kind of like a boy-friend? But not in a '_boyfriend_' boy-friend sort of way! I mean he's like a friend… who happens to be a boy…

…and we tend to share kisses a lot…

Okay. Real-talk time with Ruby Rose: it's more like I ask him for kisses and he supplies me with my fix. I know it's becoming a problem. Before I could last a day but now… _I just need it_. I just need it! On the hour, every hour… in the middle of the night, during class, sometimes in the shower…

It's becoming a problem, _I know. I know_. But what can I do?

It started with me using my super speed to get down a flight of stairs. There were tight corners and blind spots on each of the flight landings. Jaune just happened to turn around at the right moment when my face collided with his… and…

…our lips just touched. Or slammed.

And you know what? _It was magical._ It was like fireworks in my head. It was like a thousand cookies suddenly merged into a single tiny speck and a billion of these specks condensed into one super speck-cookie and it just exploded in my mouth like a huge release and inside this super speck-cookie was sweetened condensed milk so I had a splash of white wash over my face and it was just so, so, so, so… _good_.

Also I tasted a bit of blood. Jaune's nose was bleeding.

So Jaune said sorry and I think he broke his nose but he looked alright. But me? I was stuck in la-la-land… it was a wave of pure bliss washed over me like a tidal wave of milk after a ten thousand cookie feast. He promised never to tell anyone and saying "this didn't count!" while his nose was bleeding through his hands.

So the next day, I asked him if we could try it again. First he was surprised. Then he was confused. Then surprised again… I forgot the exact order but we ended up pressing our lips together.

I thought it couldn't get anymore magical. _It did_.

And so, it's become a habit. Whenever I felt the need I'd tap his shoulder and say him simply, "yo Jaune, I need some help," or "I need a moment" or "I need my fix…"

And so we'd try to find a deserted classroom or janitors room or go to the school rooftop and make it quick and snappy! Or if we had time I'd like to experiment… but that's kinda embarrassing… especially the ideas I thought of when I snuck into his bed and… well at least Nora didn't wake up!

Yep! I can confidently say that absolutely no suspicions were aroused! After all, it'd be embarrassing if someone found out Jaune was my supplier. Plus I had to be very careful about not getting pregnant. That's why I brush my teeth after each session with Double-Strength Schnee toothpaste, a blast-rinse with mouthwash, and a deep-cleaning floss over.

I'll admit to being an addict but at least I'm practicing safe kissing, right?

And so this continued for a week and so… one kisses a day became two… then three… then forty-eight… it escalated quickly. By the end of the week I needed a hundred and sixteen kisses from him just to stay sane! It doesn't even get me to normal anymore. It's part of my existence.

Not even cookies could satisfy the craving.

So I was skipping along, trying to find Jaune. He wasn't at his usual places: his room, in the park moping, in the library reading comics… where did my portable kiss-fix machine go?

So I found him, walking down one of the history wings, next to Pyrrha. They were talking about team-building activities and formulating strategies and talking about their supposed-to-be-secret-but-know-all-about-them-training-sessions-on-the-school-rooftop.

He seemed happy. He was smiling. Pyrrha was smiling. I wasn't smiling.

I was angry… for some reason I can't quite explain… but I had the brief, very brief I promise, thought of getting Pyrrha's neck hooked by my scythe and pulling the trigger. Let recoil do the work and decapitate her as my high caliber round shot into the sky and brought the blade through her neck…

Then the thought occurred to me: what if Pyrrha was using Jaune to get her fix?

I'm sorry but Ruby Rose doesn't share what _belongs_ to her!

"So I'm thinking we could call the formation between you and me… Arkos! Get it? It's like our last names… I thought it was a cool name for the formation…"

"I don't think that ship is going to sail, Jaune," Pyrrha said as she put a hand on his shoulder.

"Excuse me!" I interrupted the conversation and gently batted away Pyrrha's hand from Jaune's shoulder. "Pardon your meeting with your team captain Pyrrha but I need to borrow Jaune for a moment. You know, important team captain conversations and what not…"

"Of course," Pyrrha said with her eyes narrowed. "Take… care?" I didn't look back as I dragged Jaune away as fast as I could. Jaune kept shouting his goodbyes to Pyrrha.

I threw him into an empty classroom he landed on his butt. I leaped at him, like an animal. Maybe I had some faunus in me. But before I knew it, I was trying my damn hardest to suck out his soul. Our teeth scraped together and I fought for dominance in his oral cavity domain!

_It was delicious._

"R-mmhgh-Rub-muh! Can't breath! Ruby!" Jaune broke free. "Ruby… I think this needs to stop."

I grabbed him by the scuff of his collar and I looked him straight in the eyes. My nose to his nose. I tasted his breath and I growled to him, "you _belong_ to me. And remember this well Jaune: _Ruby Rose doesn't share_."

There was a spark of fear in his eyes. He might run. No matter. Jaune can't outrun me.

The next day I saw him asking Weiss out to a date. Later that day Weiss had to go home to see her family physician. She had unfortunately ingested some bad seafood sprinkled with moldy cookie crumbs and had uncontrollable bowel movements. How unfortunate.

Jaune asked Blake to help him study. Why didn't he ask me? No matter, Blake found herself locked in the boiler room for a few hours. That should have straightened her out. She decided she should sleep in the library now. It was a good idea.

After class, Yang blew a kiss towards Jaune. Yang never came back from her trip to town. Wonder what happened?

I sat in my room polishing my scythe. I didn't go to Jaune for kisses anymore. He comes to me whenever I summon him. He entered the Team RWBY room. I was thinking of renaming it the RUBY room and inviting Jaune to stay over. After all, I had plenty of space now.

"Hey Ruby… do you need… um… your fix?"

"Yup! Yup!" I smiled cheerfully. I set aside the polishing kit and my scythe. Closing my eyes I leaned my head forward, waiting for the delivery of the usual dosage. It didn't come fast enough. "What's wrong?"

"Why… is there so much yellow hair and blood on your scythe?" Jaune walked over to the scythe and picked up a long blonde strand of hair. "It smells like Yang's shampoo…"

"Probably from blonde Grimms? I dunno."

"Ruby… I'm-I'm kind of… I'm kind of scared."

My eyes widened.

"Scared? Of what?"

"Well… Pyrrha and I have been talking and…"

"You've been talking to Pyrrha?"

"Well yeah… I mean no! No! I haven't been talking to Pyrrha!"

My eyes narrowed. Jaune slinked back against the wall. The door was locked. I always figured he might try to run. Who's faster than me? Jaune tried to open the door, locked with a key.

"Looking for this?" I held the key out before him and smiled. He nodded. I slipped the key down my shirt. "Well you can come get it… the price is going to be heavy…"

He slide down the wall of the door and I came over him.

"R-Ruby…"

"Don't talk… don't worry your tiny little head… I'll take care of Pyrrha… I'll take care of her…"

"Ruby…"

"Shush shush… now, Jaune. _Give me a kiss_."

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_Ruby's Addicted to Kisses Fin_


End file.
